Past Lil Spills

August 31, 2013

Milwaukee is on fire! Should be fun tomorrow. I get in early afternoon .
Walgreens had a beer tasting yesterday. Pabst Blue Ribbon! You know you are having a good day when you are walking around Walgreens with a cup of Pabst inside your brand new Pabst Koozie!
Tahnee has been invited to the Community Board meetings in NYC. This is a trap. Oh god memories of those miserable meetings keep flooding back. I remember getting yelled at by some residents . ” you should conduct your business like the bar across the street!” The bar across the street was a bar called Downtown Beirut. Downtown Beirut was the most awesome, seedy, punk, dirty, dive bar in the east village. One of those places that people walk in but never walk out. You could have night vision goggles and still not be able to see inside Downtown Beirut. The backround noise was the music of the NY Dolls, Psychedelic Furs, Iggy Pop. When you walked into Downtown Beirut there should of been a waiver warning of the likelihood of contracting a communicable disease. What a great bar. ” sir not sure that I am prepared to conduct my business like that of Downtown Beirut’s.” lol memories.
Bought the Clip in pedals for my bicycle. I pulled a “Daniel ” the first time I tried to stop. I clipped out on the left side and in slow motion I fell over on the right side. Not a damn thing I could do to stop the bike from falling with my foot clipped into the pedals. Lol

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August 30, 2013

Bam Milwaukee having a great night. Good job! I will be in Milwaukee on Sunday afternoon for the 110 year Harley Davidson Anniversary. Water St will be closed down . Party in the streets.
Fun

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August 28, 2013

We have been vindicated ! Hell yeah!
Coyote Ugly Bouncers Join the Tip-Pool

A federal judge in the Middle District of Tennessee recently held that bouncers (sometimes referred to as “security guards”) at Coyote Ugly Saloons were properly permitted to participate in tip pools with bartenders, barbacks, and waitresses. The holding in Stewart v. CUS Nashville, LLC turns on the Coyote Ugly bouncers’ unique job duties, which require them to have significant customer interactions that differ from the duties of most bouncers in restaurant and retail settings.

The Fair Labor Standards Act permits tip pooling among employees who “customarily and regularly receive tips.” One of the central issues in Stewart was whether Coyote Ugly’s bouncers qualified to participate in a tip pool. The bouncers were typically paid $9 to $10 an hour, generally received 5 percent of the bartender tip pool, and were required to share 5 percent of their pool of tips with the bartenders.

In Stewart, the court applied the customer interaction test set forth in the 1998 Sixth Circuit Court of Appeals case, Kilgore v. Outback Steakhouse of Florida, Inc. The customer interaction test focuses on the level of customer interaction employees have and whether they perform “important customer service functions,” such as greeting customers, supplying them with menus, seating them at tables and, at times, enhancing the customer experience.

Applying this test to Coyote Ugly’s bouncers, the court held that there was “ample evidence in the record to demonstrate that security guards employed at company-owned Coyote Ugly saloons sufficiently interact with customers so as to constitute employees who ‘customarily and regularly receive tips’ under Kilgore.” The court recognized that the primary duty of the bouncers is to protect Coyotes (female bartenders) and customers and enhance the customer experience by performing other expected duties. For instance:

Bouncers stationed at the saloon entrance “bark” to encourage people to come inside and inform customers of drink specials and that Coyotes or patrons are dancing on the bar.
Bouncers are encouraged and expected to be funny, engaging, and charismatic and make customers feel welcome upon entering the saloon.
Bouncers dance with customers, participate in games, and recruit customers to participate. They encourage the purchase of body shots, flirt, take pictures with female customers, urge female customers to dance on the bar, and assist them and the Coyotes in getting onto and off of the bar;
Bouncers have their own “regulars” who come to visit them and from whom they receive tips.
Bouncers wear shirts with the letters, “BMF,” on the back, which customers often ask to purchase.
In essence, the court determined that the bouncers are part of the Coyote Ugly customer experience and perform many non-traditional security functions. Employers should be careful in applying the holding in Stewart to bouncers performing more traditional security-related duties. If they are not part of the show, they should not be included in a tip pool.

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August 27, 2013

I remember living in NYC having my two german shepherds, Teddy and Ajax. They were like children to me. I would of lived homeless on the street before getting rid of them. I am currently scrambling to find an apartment and I keep forgetting to ask if they allow pets. God damn it. My friend just offered me her gorgeous condo to live, god please allow me to keep the freaking dogs. This weekend Daniel said ” I keep begging my friends to take my two dogs but noone will take them.” I think it’s the traveling. Every week I hustle to find someone to watch them or pay for boarding. I just texted Jackson’s dad. ” I will pay for their food and pay you $100 a week if you keep them.” God damn it!!!

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August 26, 2013

” If we swam 800 meters in horrific rough conditions, how hard could it be to finish an Olympic distance triathlon?” Yes that was the conversation yesterday after one wine. So low and behold, Chantel, Daniel, myself, and Ben our triathlon coach have now entered the Pumpkinman Mead Lake Olympic Distance Triathlon. We all decided that we definitely did not want to do another ocean swim that could possibly have rough water so this is what we came up with.I want to thank all my friends for going along on my midlife crisis ride with me. Most women are drinking martinis by the gallon and shopping but no, not me. FUCK!
Bodyshots, bodyshots, bodyshots. How about this, sell some fucking drinks and offer good service first. urgh

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August 24, 2013

The Coyote Ugly Triathletes ( minus Chantel with Kids) at awards ceremony. No we didn’t win any awards but I think we should of . Award for a whole team that didn’t drown.an award for being cool in the face of adversity.
My time: The swim sucked!! The water was so rough that I almost threw up in the water. But I did it in 25 minutes. Very pleased with that!
Daniel beat me In over all time. From what we could figure out he beat me by about 6 minutes. Damn! Lol good day but I am bone tired

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August 24, 2013

Team Coyote Ugly! So proud of everyone! We rocked it! I am having a moment right now. I love our little company and the great people who work with me. A truly beautiful experience.

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August 23, 2013

Pre race day pedicures. All teams should do this! Just missing Chantel during pedicure tradition.
It’s pouring out with lightening. Not sure if they will cancel the swim. If they do it becomes Run, Bike, Run. The stress level is very high right now. 1. How the Fuck can you swim when the water is this rough? 2. How do you bike on these super thin tires when it’s pouring out? And Lizzie’s worry 3. How can I finish in 3.5 hours?
Urgh
I got flowers sent to the Destin bar. Hmmmm!

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August 23, 2013

I am all choked up after receiving this letter from my son’s school. I couldn’t be prouder of my son.
“Dear Anthony and Liliana,

Since school started, all of the middle school students have been sitting with their advisory groups at lunch. Today was the first day the middle school students were able to choose their seats. As the New Student Coordinator for the Middle School, I nervously looked on to see where these 29 new Greenies might sit. Some of them easily found a place and others not so much. However, one table caught my eye. It was a group of mostly new 8th grade boys, engaged in friendly conversation led by Jackson. Over the next few minutes, a few others joined the table and Jackson just kept engaging each new member. At one point, he even got up and invited another new 8th grade boy, who was sitting alone, to join the group. I was not the only adult in the room who noticed this act of kindness. Many faculty and staff members were quick to ask who he was when they saw what he did and those who do know him sang his praises. I don’t know Jackson very well, but I can tell you from what I saw and from what I’ve heard, that he is obviously an amazing young man and we are lucky to have him at Newman.”

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August 22, 2013

Bam the Coyote Ugly Triathlon team is ready to head to Destin. Tommy, Lizzie, and Daniel, came here last night and ate dinner with Jackson and I. Every other comment that Daniel made I had to say to Jackson ” never treat women like this.” Oh god.
We all rode 10 miles on the levee this morning. Why does someone’s pain cause others to be so happy? Daniel fell off his bike trying to clip out. I could hear Tommy from behind roaring laughing. Ah that’s a good omen! Ok ready to hit the road. Chantel will be joining our team in Destin

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August 20, 2013

So sad Darryl, a New Orleans bouncer , just lost his wife. I feel so bad for him. On the same day our long time bud rep, Jimmy for the New Orleans bar, passed away as well. Sad sad day.
Tomorrow Lizzie, Tommy, and Daniel will show up to sleep at my house before we all set off to Destin on Thursday. That’s it. I took my last practice swim today.Let’s do this shit! I think I am going to wear a set of goggles that are a hybrid regular goggle and snorkle goggle. Please no sharks and no jelly fish!!!

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August 19, 2013

Bam Denver Great Sunday night! I love to see those numbers. Nashville crushed all the bars on Saturday night. Again bam!
I think that’s it. Need to focus back on work this week. Lets make some money?

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August 18, 2013

Yesterday. ” Kevin you are such a good friend for coming to New Orleans to cheer me up.” Cut to 7 am this morning being woken up to pounding on the front door. ” Kevin why are you outside with no shirt and no shoes?” Let’s just say that Kevin, Leslie and I hit Bourbon St like tourists last night. Wine, Vodka shots, hurricanes, Karoake, The Dungeon. The only thing we didn’t do was go to a strip club. Thank god I wasn’t drunk when we were at Coyote. I hate making a fool of myself at my own bar. This morning Leslie called. “Does Kevin know how to sail?” I don’t think so. ” He joined my sailing crew for a regata out of Key West and so did you.” I don’t know how to sail. In fact I actually get sea sick from swimming some times. ” Lil you promised.” Can’t I look pretty and root from shore?
Matthew a bouncer in New Orleans is joining us at the Sandestin Triathlon!!!

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August 15, 2013

Had a full physical yesterday. 3 hours. I have never had such an indepth exam. The first hour was just the intake questions. ” so why don’t you know , with certainty , how your maternal grandmother died?” Can I answer that my mother is a bit weird. ” Miss Lovell please explain?” Well my mother and I were on the phone last year and she was stating that her mother was a pretty smoker. I replied that no one is a pretty smoker . After that my mother changed my grandmother’s death from emphysema to an obstructed colon. So I believe she may have lied but I am not 100% sure. I couldn’t make this up!
I was given a bone density scan. With this machine they can find out your true fat percentage. The doctor read the results ” from the waist up your fat percentage is that of a competitive athlete. Sorry Miss Lovell but your butt raises your overall fat percentage. ” Again my mothers fault. Lol

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August 13, 2013

Milwaukee, good job last night! Going to push back Key West anniversary a few weeks. Postponed Bucharest opening. Trying to get things lined up properly .
There are some crazy things going on in San Antonio. One of the neighboring restaurants is trying to pull some shit with us. ” dude, do you realize that if we didn’t do so well you wouldn’t have any customers? If it wasn’t for the spill over that we provide you, you would be out of business. And lets face facts your food isn’t going to be on the Food Network anytime soon.”
Right now I am sitting in the waiting room while my son and his friend get their first facials. I knew that the only way Jackson would go is if his friend went as well. 1. What do you want to accomplish at this facial? My son’s answer. ” get my mom off my back.” Lol
Is it normal to have indentations from swim goggles for 24 hours? Yesterday we all received , via Kristina , an article about Destin having sharks in the water. Add it to the list of worries for this triathlon.
“Miss Lovell we canceled your birth control prescription because you answered the intake questionaire with a cautionary answer.” I had one migraine last year that was accompanied with vision sensitivity and you canceled my birth control. Unfucking believable!

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August 11, 2013

I want to thank all of our incredible lawyers and staff that testified at our last lawsuit hearing. Congrats to everyone ! Justice has prevailed and we won the case! What a god send!
Well I am definitely back to work today. The first email I opened was the resignation of one of our floor managers in NY over an incident that happened last night. Oh brother.
I was going to head to Key West this week but I may stay home. Ok how long do I have to train for this triathlon? Fuck ! I am less prepared for this one, which happens to be longer, then I was for the last one. Daniel and I were laughing about it last week. He’s scared too. Ok maybe I need to practice backstroke

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August 9, 2013

I am awed and so grateful for all the people in our Coyote Ugly family that have sent my family such beautiful wishes, flowers , and food. I am truly thankful.
My dad didn’t want a service of any kind but we decided to invite the neighbors over since they have been so kind. Kevin found a Latin food place and helped organize catering. Delicious! There were at least 40 neighbors who came over and had personal stories about my dad and mom. At one point, I looked around and realized ” shit if I die tomorrow not one neighbor is coming to my house.” So my pledge is that when I move to San Diego I will cease my NY scrounge demeanor and meet the neighbors. One of the neighbors told me that she was so close to getting my father to have a glass of wine the night before he died. Not sure how that would of effected him? I was shocked that everything went well yesterday. Only one bout of crazy. Unfortunately this continues today.
Me” mom we need to go to the bank and start closing some of dads accounts.”
Mom: ” no we need to get Coco ( dog) groomed.”
Mom: ” Liliana tell Petsmart that your dad died so they can squeeze Coco in today.”
Me: ” I am not playing the death card with Freaking Petsmart.”
My sister and I were laughing so hard. Her husband owns a company called Stay on Line. They make custom power cords. They do quite well. The florist had delivered two bouquets of flowers. One was gorgeous white roses and the other was a small vase of quaint flowers. When my brother in law came to my Mom’s house my sister said ” Jim, see these gorgeous roses? Those are from Jeff at Coyote Ugly. See these small pathetic vase of flowers? Those are from your company.” The joke continues because the various managers from our bars have been sending gorgeous arrangements.
Again thanks everyone. ” I will groom the fucking dog! “

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August 8, 2013

Wow. I have some really wonderful friends. So many people with kind thoughts. Thank You. I want to say two special thanks to Chantel and Kevin. Chantel was able to send a same day edible arrangement to my Mom’s house ( not easy because they live in the boondocks). And Kevin is helping me find Latin restaurants to cater for my mom , family and neighbors. He’s also called me many times yesterday and today to check on me. Really sweet.
In true Latin form I have only black clothing. I even brought black workout gear. My mother wore black for 2 years when her brother died, 2 years black and 1 year blue for her mother’s death, she even wore black for 6 months when the dog died. Please lord or higher being dont let today be as crazy as all our family functions tend to be.

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August 7, 2013

My dad passed away this morning. Arthur Lovell Rest in Peace

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August 7, 2013

Death seems to be all around me. My dad has not eaten one bite in 3 weeks. Dying holds no dignity. The fables of aging gracefully and dying being peaceful are not always true. I have been reading a book called The Faults of our Stars. In the book the protagonist is a teenage cancer patient ( mandatory book reading for 8th graders). The main character reads this one book over and over. The ending of this book is a sentence that is not finished. You do not find out what happens to the various characters. That’s it. the book she loves ends with no real resolution. But that’s the truth. People die everyday and life goes on. Today the police searched my neighborhood for a gunman. Had he stopped at my house and shot me ( yes I would of died pissed) , life would of continued. The parents in pennsylvania that married for their dying son, held their son while he died today. I can’t truly understand their misery but life will continue. Daniel and I went to dinner tonight. We spoke about every bar in the system including bars we haven’t opened yet. Then of course we spoke about the upcoming triathlon. When I got home to face my next trip, I thought about my dad and how he went to the doctor . They told him how his cancer had spread and he literally went home to die. I feel great physically. Other then a few issues at work my life is outstanding. If I was told tomorrow that I was going to die. I think I would still do this triathlon. I know it might seem simplistic but I want to keep challenging myself. OK 3 wines with Daniel and I am getting mushy. Sorry. New topic.
Of course A Rod took steroids. He’s obviously off of them now that’s why he looks like shit. Save the money prosecuting him, this isn’t rocket science

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August 6, 2013

Woke up today a little weepy because I accepted an offer for my house. Well weepiness is over the police just showed up looking for a gun man in my neighborhood. Oh brother . Now my thoughts are ” I better not die before I sell this fucking house.
My whole Key West anniversary party has collapsed . I need to scramble

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August 3, 2013

The article entitled ” The other F word” has come back to bite me in the ass. All week I have been thinking to myself, ” maybe I call myself fat too much in front of Jackson.” ” Maybe his dad and I shouldn’t joke about being fat and lazy if he’s playing his playstation.” ( again Jackson is lean ). Today Jackson and I ran the Balboa Park 8 mile run. The first 4 miles Jackson struggled. At the water station I decided to take off and just meet up with him at the finish line. In my mind I was thinking ” I have to take this play station away if he is this out of shape.” I was a 1/4 mile away from the 8 mile finish line when my phone rings. ” Mom where are you?” Dude I am still running. OH NO. When I crossed the finish line Jackson said ” Who’s the slow fatass now!” Yup that would be me. lol. He must of passed me somewhere between mile 6-7. Damn . Oh god he’s is going to rub this in all day.
The phone just rang. ” Miss Lovell the tenant in your Pensacola condo left a pot on the stove. There was no interior damage to the condo but the fire department broke down the front door.” URGH
Haven’t read one manager’s log all week. Let’s hope it was a good week.

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August 1, 2013

I saw the Light!!! I just read an article about The Miss Rodeo of America Pageant. I have got to be a part of this. These incredible women must look good in a dress with a full face of makeup and be asked to jump on a strangers horse and ride like a master horseman. OH MY GOD, I need to sponsor someone! I can see the Coyote Ugly leather chaps next to the Coyote Ugly ballroom gown. I wonder if any of our girls in Denver can ride? Deedee a woman who worked on the set of the Coyote Ugly tv show was a wrangler. She had training roping, riding , and wrangling. I need to call her.
Last night we picked our cover for the 2014 Coyote Ugly Calendar. It came down to two different girls . We went back and forth a million times. Finally I sent it out to 3 friends and they all unanimously picked one picture over the other. Bam 2014 calendar ready for production.

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