” My night sucks ! I am searching high and Low for all these chickens !” ” This was Jeff’s answer when I returned a work email and asked how he was doing. I guess his neighbor asked him to watch his chickens and they got loose. I was going to say First world problems. But perhaps that isn’t a first world problem. I can imagine that loosing chickens is a huge third world problem.

I received a text from Lee’s wife ” when you see Lee can you tell him to contact me.” Lee went to New Orleans this week unbeknownst to me. I replied to her 1. You need to slap him around a little and show him who is boss.” and 2. Jazz, the GM, can drink like a man so he’s probably singing Karaoke on Bourbon St right now.

My god I am still receiving emails about Milwaukee. OMG!!! Tomorrow is Jackson’s last shift at Samurai Pie till next summer. He’s a good worker. I bet they will miss him..

“Woman Sees Trump’s Face In Her Tub Of Butter” Yes this was deemed news on the internet. I love this country. Crazy people  push other people to drink at Coyote Ugly. It’s a huge win.
Busy today. Some new projects I have to check out. All positive. Had a great night with Jackson last night watching Fear the Walking Dead and Band of Brothers. I am so lucky. My kid is so bright and kind.

” Your cousin will be deported immediately!” There has been a lot of family drama in my life recently. And this just came up. When I was 12 my cousin from Colombia lived with us and was taking classes to learn English. We were supposed to go on our 2nd vacation of our lives to the Bahamas. Again I repeat ,  I was 12. My mother sent me to the immigration office,  by myself,  in Manhattan to get approval for my cousin to go on this trip. I went by myself. I waited on all the appropriate lines and they told me that her visa would not be affected by our journey .  We went to the Bahamas for 3 days. On our return we went through immigration.  ” Sorry this is a violation of your visa. You will be deported immediately.” I don’t even remember how long I was punished for.

Who sends a 12 year old to do this important job? (  as god as my witness I did everything properly) But again only my mother would do something like that and actually blame me for doing it wrong. Oh Brother. A ton of family drama. Everyone has some drama but the constant crazy that I grew up with is unbelievable. A miracle I did well for myself. LOL

Mac put a bio of me in the back of the SD menu sleeve. About a month ago I saw it and was shocked. The bio was from an article I hadn’t even written it or fact checked it. ” What the hell this bio isn’t even correct. Why the fuck did you post this?” Sorry Lil the rep just pulled something from a newspaper article. OH brother. My fault at the end of the day. I was so worried about the menu I didn’t even think to look at the bio page.

image“lay off the damn fried foods before the photo shoot”. “what was it an all night blow fest before the photoshoot” This is the commentary going back and forth between Lee and I while reviewing the ad shoot photos . These girls are not Coyote Ugly emoployees but girls we hired from an agency specific to create new ads. Honestly they came out great but there are always a few pictures that are not attractive .

The apocalypse has hit New Orleans and people have stopped going out to drink . The bar is the worst in the company right now . It’s fucking New Orleans!! There are more drunks per square block in the French quarter then anywhere on the planet . The staff is super pretty right now . My god what the hell is going on there ? If it wasn’t 120 degrees in the shade  I would go next week .

On a good note . I hired a new housekeeping company . My house is actually neat but I hate sweeping and mopping . They came in like a cyclone today !!! Gracias Dios.  Something about a clean smelling house . I have told Jackson to lock his room . I don’t want to scare them away . It’s a science experiment gone wrong in there .

And today Jackson will receive his first check from Samurai Pie! He really is a hard worker . Chip off the block . “Save it now because in about 6 years  your friends will  know when you get paid and say First round on Jackson .” I need to make sure he is conveniently absent from parties those days . But life as a molecular biologist doesn’t leave room for many parties .  ( not his dream but mine )

” What? She left the safe door opened and the office door unlocked?” Unfucking believable. And supposedly she is asking for recommendations at other bars that we own. Yeah, I don’t think so.

Kevin just called me. I have been in a bit of a funk, I would like to say for the last few weeks but realistically for 8 months. ” Lil once I get clearance from my eye doctor lets go fly fishing. ” Little did Kevin know that I have already done my Glamping research and have places in mind for just this kind of trip. ” What the f is Glamping?” What better way  to experience the outdoors then hiking , fly fishing, horseback riding during the day then returning to your tent with a real bed, 5 star dinner menu, and high end wine? That my friend is glamping  and it’s the only way I will go on this outting!!!

Class action suit filed against the Olsens. To paraphrase the main person starting the suit: “As an intern you are treated like an employee without the pay.” Am I taking crazy pills but that is what the internship is based around. Getting practical work experience in a work environment without pay!!!” I won’t post it but her name is in the various articles that are circulating. Guess who is now unhireable? We are in a world of entitled, lazy people. In the article it says that the Olsen’s company also did not give the appropriate college credits. If that’s the case then they should be penalized. An intern should be given college credits if they deserve it. ( we had one intern. Stifler. Yup like the movie. Funny funny) . All the news. EPA ruined a river, devastating. Trump is an idiot, we all know that. The Kardashians broke a nail, get super glue and fix it. Now this is a good one. Lorenzo Lamas’s wife doing porn!!, OK I will read that one. Ferguson riots, sad. What else?

This year has been the least amount of work travel I have ever done and now we are seeing the fallout from that. ” My life is boring and I read to much online news.” As god as my witness, or whomever, I pledge to have more of a social life by Christmas!! Or go back on the road for work and kick some ass.

Kylie Jenner gets Ferrari for 18th birthday! For those who are brewing with jealousy, just think about it. Money can’t buy you love! If Tyga really loved her and cared for her why not do something special since she can buy a car for herself.  Write her a song. He is supposedly a rapper. Do something truly heart felt. Those are my two cents.

Lilapalooza, my birthday celebration as my friend Leslie calls it,  might be in Sante Fe this year at some wine festival. Bam. It’s a month or so away but something to look forward to.

The shit going on with the employees lately is just horribly typical. Chantel has taken over Human Resources. ” Lil, so and so called to say that this manager was disrespectful to a customer. Lil,  so and so called to say that they really didn’t make out with another girl in the bathroom. So and So called and said that they really don’t have a bad attitude. So and so called and said they didn’t actually see the fight but they heard about it.” What is going on with this country ? If someone calls in sick every month saying that their almost new boob job hurts and the left and right boob aren’t the same size”, why can’t I say ” Hey you, I am sick of the boob job excuse . You are freaking fired!” Why when someone calls me and says ” Lil why was I passed up for the promotion ?,  can’t I say, ” You are not getting promoted because you whine more then a little girl and the thought of listening to it every week makes my skin crawl.”?

Obviously I woke up on the wrong side of the bed. Even though,  knock on wood , the bars did awesome Saturday and Sunday! Bam even New Orleans pulling off a great Saturday. Not sure why all the americans marveling over Kylie’s new Ferrari doesn’t seem to bring me joy. Fuck the Ferrari. Get me a nice glass of wine ,  a beautiful sunset , and add on a back massage. That’s a little piece of heaven.

“Woman runs London Marathon without Tampon to raise awareness.” She lists two reasons for doing this. 1. To help woman who don’t have the financial means to get tampons or other feminine products . OK I can agree with that. I can’t imagine not having enough money to buy myself female hygiene products. That must be so scary for a young woman. And humiliating.

2. To destigmatize women when they have their periods.  I can’t lie I haven’t felt stigmatized by my period since high school. I could go to any of my bars and have one of my male managers get me a tampon. They are used to it. We even keep extra tampons at the bars.

But as much as I applaud this runner . So gross running a whole marathon just free bleeding.

Bars: only one bar did well last night, Nashville!!! Thanks Nashville

Bars that are on my shit list!!!! In Order

1. San Antonio 2. NYC 3. New Orleans

Wake up to this shit in San Antonio.  7 am I received a text ” Lil can we do a call about San Antonio

Yesterday was a day dealing with the bullshit happening in NYC

New Orleans is simply doing very poorly and I want them to revamp SOMETHING!!

Now I am in a bad mood.

Last night I went to the 4 year memorial for  Jon Tomlinson . He was a navy seal that was killed in a helicopter attack in Afghanistan. It was a small group of friends.  The group throwing this memorial  happened to all meet in a running group based out of SD. I was invited because I start the running group this Saturday. I am a tad scared after meeting some of these people. ” He ran for University of …, he just did a 100 miles in 24 hours, he holds the fastest time in …. ” I said to my triathlon coach Jim Vance ” why the hell am I joining this group? I am struggling at 2 miles right now?”  Don’t worry Lil, there are runners of all capacities.

Funny. celebrity.yahoo.com/news/heres-cast-coyote-ugly-looks-124100533.html

Hmmm. Maria Bello played me in the movie. When I saw her at the premiere my son was a year old . We were chatting and I said to Maria ” my son ” Jackson” was born in October.” Low and behold she had a son a year or two later and she named her son Jackson as well. A coincidence? HMMM I don’t think so. Lol. Damn cool name.  Now I would like to request that people stop naming their children that so it can stay cool.