Travis used my computer for 2 seconds yesterday and completely fucked things up. I tried to log on today and it kept pulling up Travis' account. " Well Lil I told Amelie you had some problems" I had no problems. Everything was fine on my end. These freaking tech geeks always screwing things up! " Yes Travis you are a tech geek. You know it and we know it" My question is: why do the tech geeks always take at least two tries to fix something? And why did Travis think he should take it upon himself to call the webdesigner with a problem for me when I did not even know there was a problem? Freaking kids!
The terminex guy came to my house today to spray the yard for mosquitos. I had to run a few errands so I left Cheeto inside and set the alarm when I left. I set the alarm to the wrong setting and shortly received a call from chantel saying that ADT had notified the police of an intruder in my living room. I called ADT because I realized that Cheeto set off the alarm. Unfortunately it was too late. The police were already at my house. I know this is cruel but I couldn't stop laughing thinking of the cops grilling this poor terminex guy.
Charlotte did incredibly well during speedweek. I felt so sorry for Chris W ( GM). There was some water problem with the city so the bar had no water. A few regulars had to jerry rig the plumbing so that the toilets could flush. Nothing ever runs smoothly. The staff did a great job. In fact on Friday night that little charlotte bar beat all the other bars in the company! Saturday night Nashville slammed everyone. It was a killer weekend for the bars. Very unusual considering it was Memorial Day weekend. Usually the bars are slow. Let's just say I am very pleased. Austin is heading into Rot Rally and nashville is heading into Fanfair. Huge events for the bars. I am heading up to Nashville because a little girl from the " Make a Wish Foundation " wants to see the bar and meet me. I am very excited to meet her and say hello to Nashville staff.
Jackson said to me yesterday " how do you feel knowing that everyday you drop me off at school and I am tortured all day by my french teacher?" My reply " pretty good actually. I had to go to school. Your dad had to go to school. Now you have to go to school. The torture of school is a rite of passage!" I was speaking to a couple yesterday whose daughter is in jackson's class. They were concerned that their daughter wasn't being challenged enough. They were telling me how quickly she reads and finishes all of her homework. I had to laugh because at night Jackson and I go through the same routine. " Jackson we need to do your homework!" " But Mom I work so hard all day. This is my home. It is a place of fun and love. I shouldn't have to work when I am here" From what his grandmother tells me this is exactly how his dad was in school. When I was in grade school I was always in honors classes and I sailed through very easily. ( hard to imagine considering my poor spelling and grammer) Jackson is very bright he just views school as a chore. This year his grades went up enormously after December. The change came when he finally resigned himself to having to attend school. " Mom the horror!" Jackson tells me that he wants to be a veterinarian one day, but there is a little voice in me that thinks he would be a great actor. Whatever he wants as long as he has passion, I'm all for it.

The last few days I have been feeling very tired and I realized that I have done quite a bit within a 30 day period. I have gone to Hong Kong, Macau, Bahamas, Memphis, and Las Vegas all within that time. I'm getting old. I need at least 10 days to be at home.
I need to learn how to work this celebrity thing a bit more. I called to make an appointment to color my hair, I didn't even warrant a call back.
I go to a place called Bamboo Apothecary for facials. I love them and they always make me feel at home. When I tell them that I can't get an appointment for a haircut or something else they are always like " Lil what do you mean? Tell them that you have to do the show this week." That isn't my style to use the celebrity card. They have actually called for me a few times and set up appointments at other places since I obviously can't do it for myself. If it bennifitted the business I would have no problem walking in and saying " I need this Now!" But for me personally I feel silly using that. But I will tell you this, I look like shit and wish my fucking hair was colored for Chantel's second wedding reception tomorrow. Crap!
What a day today. I am trying to get a new mortgage on the New Orleans building. I keep reciting to myself " how the fuck can my credit be this bad?" Peace and tranquility.
I have two hypocondriacs that work for me, Kevin and Daniel. Daniel is a bit freaked out by the prosepect of having to go to China. So I sent him a site that makes designer surgical masks. Today i received a call from him and he said " I wouldn't know if I had Avian flu symptoms?" I said " Does it really matter cause you'll die anyway!" I don't know why I find that so funny but I do. " Daniel I will buy you a gallon of purrell for your trip"
Today Jackson's school had a pajama day . When I asked him this morning which pajamas he wanted to wear he said " no I will wear my school uniform ( he actually calls his uniform his day to day school costume). I asked him Why? His response was " I looked really good in my uniform" Ok you can't argue with that.

CHARLOTTE smoked everyone last night. AWESOME!!! I am so pleased. It's speed week this week in Charlotte. Nice to see such big numbers.
The Las Vegas girls said that they were hurt that I never choose one of them as Coyote of the Month. I told them that I have requested nominations from the managers but the managers never write me back or communicate with me. I told them to write to me and nominate a girl they think deserves Coyote of the month. So far I only have one nomination. Come on it's almost the end of the month, get your nominations in!!
Chantel and Daniel told me this week that Addrianna had to fire Wiggins from ft. Lauderdale. Daniel told me that he witnessed her telling customers how much better she was then the other girls. She even said that the show was rigged. Addrianna said that the other girls did not want to work with her anymore. She was so mean and big headed. It breaks my heart. I have so many girls who work for me but only a select few get to participate in the show or traveling. Instead of treating it like an honor she treated it with disrespect and arrogance. This is why she wasn't the Ultimate Coyote because the Ultimate Coyote has to be a team player. Wiggins in my mind was the best freestyle dancer in the whole company. I had plans for her to travel to tradeshows, new bars , and other tv appearances. She really blew it. This could have been a great opportunity for her. On a good note Amanda still works at Coyote Ft. Lauderdale. I hope things work out for her.
One last thing about the show. I am sick of hearing about Maria being a favorite. Maria works at the New york bar with Jacqui. If she is close with Jacqui that has nothing to do with me. I have lived in New Orleans for 5 1/2 years. I am probably closer to the New Orleans girls because I see them more often. But that does not change my opinion about who is a great Coyote. Everyone gets treated equally. Maria won because when it came down to the two days of finals , she and her teammate were the most aggressive as a team. Wiggins on the second night was unmatched by anyone but it was a team competition and the overall score from the two nights were higher with Maria and Regan. Enough!
As an observer, I wonder why the viewers did not take to Maria and Regan like some of the other teams? Is it because the cross section of viewers of CMT are from middle america and do not like New Yorkers? Did they seem too hard? If they cried more would they seem more likeable? I'll tell you this; every round of cuts I made Maria cried. It was very emotional for her. maybe the show did not capture that. I don't know. Interesting though.
Regardless, for the third season I hope my girls don't pull some of this shit. Good luck. A whole new slew of girls for you guys to like or bitch to me about!

Just got back from a convention in Vegas. Stopped by the Vegas bar and met the girls. Interesting to meet the girls who work at the franchised bars. It's a totally different vibe there then at one of my bars. But the girls were really trying they just don't have the same tools as my girls do. Their training is different. They even have different choreographed numbers. But I spoke with a few of them and it is so refreshing to hear how much they love their bar. So endearing to me to hear that. I will say this if there was a category for best bodies, the Vegas bar would definitely win. Tall girls and short girls but all with washboard flat stomachs. I know it's hard for the franchise bars because they don't get included in a lot of new things going on but I have to pick the girls I know and since I do not run the franchises I don't get to know the Coyotes there. We'll see what I can do to incorporate them a little more.
Back to work!!!

Finally the show is over! I want to say something to everyone and all my girls. I stand by my decision that Regan and Maria won the competition. The finals was over a period of two days. The first night Maria and Regan crushed everyone in overall performance. The second night I felt Wiggins and Amanda were the best. But when I scored the two nights together Maria and Regan came out ahead. I love all the girls Congrats to all of them. They all worked very hard.
Let's talk about life outside the show. I just want to explain to everybody that this is a show and in real life there are alot of Coyotes that I consider incredible. For the show the girls I nominate have to have tangible, visual skills like dancing and singing. But in real life at the Coyotes there are unbelievably great girls that are not the best technical dancers . They can't sing. But the crowd goes wild for them. They are great sellers and bartenders. They just have the gravity that draws people to them. These girls I can't put on the show because the camera can't capture their true spirit . There are some nights that I visit the bars where I watch one girl who exemplifies everything I expect in a Coyote and for that night I view them as the Ultimate Coyote. I've walked in the Austin bar and been mesmerized by Esther, she's incredible and the customers love her. But she can't dance and sing so it would be difficult for her to compete on the show. The grand Opening night of Miami, one of my traveling Coyotes from Charlotte, Sherry, rang in $3500 + $4000 service bar. That's $7500! She did all of this while entertaining people. For that night she was the Ultimate Coyote. I could go on all night. The show is about competing in events that are visual like dancing and singing so some of my best girls are unable to compete in that arena. It does not mean they are not great. It just means that their greatness is hard to quantify without being able to watch them in person.
Memphis 1 year anniversary. What a great time! They gave me an incredibe present!!! They gave me an original painting done by Johnny Cash. It is unbelievable. Wow what an incredibly well thought out gift. It made me cry. That is a great bar. Such warm people. A true family. Congrats Memphis I love you guys!

Am I taking crazy pills? I just read about the little 4 year old british girl who was abducted from her hotel room in a portugese resort while vacationing with her parents. Quite a few celebrities have come out making pleas for the girls safe return to her parents. I have just read two articles that both state that the parents left this 4 year old and their twin 2 year olds by themselves in the hotel room while they went out to a restaurant for dinner. Am I insane or should social services come in and arrest the parents? Of course I hope this girl is safe. But I have not read one article in reference to the fact that the parents were negligent. I am outraged by this. That poor little girl.
The world can be a very bad place.
Nashville sucked last night. There is a new assistant manager there, Jim. I wrote him today cause it's obvious that he is a jinx.
Charlotte has been doing really well. I laughed when I read todays log. There has been a bowlers convention there and Chris w commented " who knew that bowlers drank so much!" You've got to love the bowlers.
I'll be in Memphis on thursady for the Memphis anniversary. I will probably drive but I'm already scared of driving back home on Friday with a bad hang over. I read the book " The Secret" and it tells you to wake up everyday and be grateful for things in your life. I'm grateful for a lot of things . I want to include today that I am grateful for Bre, a Memphis Coyote, cause she always sends me cute text messages . One of the nicest things about these messages is she always ends them with " Love you." I think that is so sweet. And it makes me realize how important all the little families of the various Coyotes are. "Love you to Bre " and all the rest of the staffs, barbacks, porters, bouncers and managers!!
This saturday Lala from new orleans is graduating from Tulane University. She invited me to her graduation. She has been on the CMT tv show. She was in last years calendar. And has traveled with me to other cities for Coyote yet her dad does not know she works at Coyote. If I go to the graduation I can assure you that he will know she works with us. My little girl is growing up.

It's interesting how the human mind works. I receive a ton of e-mails, most of them very positive but there are a few that are negative. Why , like most humans am I absorbed with the negative ones?
Ok someone wrote me today and told me to speak less about my son and more about the girls.
The girls: You want the truth, I'll give you the truth. When we open these bars we start with various amounts according to the size of the bar. Nashville is huge I think we hired 50 at the girl search but Austin was smaller we may have hired 25 or 30. When I hire these girls I look for different attributes in each girl. There is only 1 girl in a 100 who will be able to bartend, dance, sing, and be a hard worker. That said I look for an individual talent that can be used at our coyotes. Now after I hire them I make sure that I have hired around 10 extra because I know once they get to Jacqui and realize this is hard work at least 10 will drop ( usually a combination of the them get fired or quit). So now our staff is smaller. Out of these girls only a few truly get it. The few that get it understand that all of this translates into sales. But some don't. Some come to me and can't bartend and within months are fast bartenders. Some come to me and never improve. Some come to me timid and leave confident women. Some come to me strong and leave with a sense of community. Some come to me with a chip on their shoulders and leave with the same chip. Some change their whole lives. Some work for me for years and some work one shift. I have had girls who try so hard and I have had girls who barely try. I have had girls who quit because of boyfriend issues and I have had girls who leave their boyfriends if they have issue with Coyote. I have had calls in the middle of the night because of accidents, happiness, rage. I have had heartbreak over girls who turn in a wrong direction and get into trouble. I have had extreme jubilation over girls that got their lives together and made a righteous path for themselves. You want to know truth? After filming the show , Kat from Charlotte was let go. Why ? Because she put herself over the wellbeing of the other employees of the Charlotte bar. Being on the show was an honor not a right to make others feel bad. No person is bigger then everyone else and that is why all my bars become little families.
Now let's talk about how I spend my day. We will use today as an example. I got to work and worried about a huge tax bill the new orleans bar was given. Then I received an e-mail about a law suit ( ridiculous) against the denver bar. Then I spoke about the financial issues with the Miami bar. Then I spoke to daniel about getting some maintenance problems fixed in Ft. Lauderdale. Then I started getting the P and L statements from the accountants on all the bars. Then I tried to pin down some paperwork from the NY bar. Then I tried to book a flight next week to Vegas for meetings. Then I looked on line for calendar examples so we could finish the 2008 calendar. Now I am trying to complete a menu for a bar we haven't opened yet so Kevin can create a kitchen budget. And lastly, I am trying to find someone to temporarily help San Antonio while they are looking for a third manager.
Now I have to get all this done before Jackson gets home.

I am about to explode today. What the fuck? Yesterday was mother's day. Jackson was an angel all day until the late afternoon. We had invited over one of his friends and her parents. We were having a nice time and all of a sudden Jackson got very pouty. " Mom I don't like that she gets in and out of the pool all the time. I want her to leave cause I won't let her torture me for the rest of the day" He was so rude that her parents left. I am so embarrassed. He didn't have a fit, it wasn't like that. But he was so cold and pouty that he made everyone uncomfortable. Only child syndrome.
What else? I was sent two samples for the 2008 calendar. I liked the first and did not like the second. Of course Lee does not like the first so this should be an all day rant from Lee about the artistic reasons why he does not like the first. I am in no mood to deal with that. I just bought new insurance and I had to take a few health tests. Everything seemed ok but when I got on the scale I was horrified. The doctor knew me and had done my last exam. She laughed and said " you're eating too much sushi." So I called Chantel " sorry but we can no longer go out for sushi. Getting old sucks. I used to be able to eat whatever I wanted to, that is no longer a reality.
On a good note, Charlotte is doing so well. I am so pleased. For the most part, the bars are on an upward swing!!!
Last year the Denver bar was robbed at gun point. We just found out that they arrested the guy last week. It's nice to know that the police did not let it drop and the robber was apprehended!
The e-mails about the show are so volumous, I can't keep up. Let me sum up for everyone with questions regarding the show and cuts. I did what I thought was right according to the effort and results of the girls. That's it. If you don't agree, sorry but I am perfectly content with my choices.

The beauty about the show is that noone elses opinion matters but mine. So bitch all you want. Now on the other side of this, I love all the veteran girls. It was very hard for me to cut them but it is a competition and it is for the best team. Someone stopped me today at a store and asked when the show was on? I said that I thought it was on Fridays but I had no idea what time. She said to me " how don't you know what time your own show is on?" I guess that is pathetic but I don't watch the show for no other reason then sheer vanity. I don't want to see myself on TV and start microanalysizing every flaw about myself.
It is very interesting how many mom's write to me and tell me that their sons love to watch the show. It's only my son who has absolutely no interest in the show. He has never seen even one episode. His friends, who watch the show, all think that bartending can only be done by girls and part of bartending is dancing and signing. Jackson will say " why do you need someone to pour you a drink?" My response " Don't say that to anyone cause that's how mommy makes her living and we don't want people to stop coming to mommy's bars"
I found about 15 coyote ugly wrist watches. I think we had them on the site for sale about 6 years ago. Only 1 person ever bought one. I just gave one to my new assistant, you could see the look on her face as she said "oh thanks, but I have a watch already" " Judy, I know it's ugly but who knows it may be a collectors item one day." She hasn't been here in a couple of weeks because of all my trips. She's in knee deep with paper work.
Charlotte and Denver Awesome numbers!! Very pleased.

I just read my e-mail from my lil spill account. Alot of anger over kat getting cut from the show. Just to clarify she got cut because of sheer immaturity. I haven't seen the show so I don't know how much they show versus how much gets left on the editing floor but her immaturity created a huge rift between her and her team mate. It was inevitable.
I know I am insane but for mother's day I really want that planter that grows plants inside. I will have to search the internet for the name but I thought it would be a nice project for Jackson and I with a more optimal outcome versus just regular planting. I don't know why it sounds so appealing to me but it does. How great will it be for jackson and I to grow tomotoes with minimal effort and less of a failure rate!!

I just got off the phone with Kyle. We were going through a few war stories but he had a great quote " I have forgotten more then I remember." I am in a very good mood today. I'm really not sure why considering all the shit going on in the various bars. One of the managers always complains that he/she works so many hours. I don't consider you goofing around on " myspace" working. Myspace can be a great marketing tool for bars/clubs but if you think I am buying that you need to spend 5 hours a day on it , you've got another thing coming. I love that I can do a lot of research on the computer. Chris B and I were speaking this morning about how much we google. But the internet also creates so many problems. A while back we found one of our managers coming in early for work just to look at gay porn. " Do what ever you want at home when you are not at work. You want to go on myspace on your day off, Go for it. When you go home from work and want to watch amputee porn, good for you. But when you are at work you are expected to work. Don't waste your work time with this shit!" Another day.
Very pleases with Denver's improvement. The staff is really coming around. Nashville, holy shit!!! I read last night manager's log and I thought I had made a mistake and it was saturday. Great night! There is a franchise I want to mention that is starting to really pick up and that is Panama City. Good job.
Another moment that made me laugh. Addrianna ( GM of Ft. Lauderdale) called me the other day and said " Lil what the fuck? Every time I turn on the tv show there are my girls ( Amanda and Wiggins) crying. My mom even called me and said ' why are your girls so weepy all the time?" I can hear regular people saying " there are those Ft. lauderdale girls crying again." I laughed so hard. Addrianna has a sense of humor like me sometimes. I remember her telling me about one of the bouncers weeping about his girlfriend breaking up with him. She said something to the effect of " of course she broke up with you, you act like a crying little girl" then I chimed in with " if your going to cry get on your Harley, cry as much as you want, and when you get off you can blame it on the wind" Those are the fun little moments we share.

Chantel's wedding weekend at Atlantis in the Bahamas
The positives:
1. The wedding was beautiful. We all witnessed two people very much in love that have an incredible friendship and an incredible depth of love for each other.
2. Got to lay out in the sun
3. Went swimming
4. Walked in a shark tank with sharks swimming all around me. ( pretty cool)
5. Saw my friends and had fun with them
Negatives:
1. My bag did not show up when I did.
2. I had no clothes so I had to spend money on toiletries, clothes etc ( very expensive there)
3. They told me to wait til after midnight because some bags come in on last flight. ( no bag) I called the front desk two times for a toothbrush and toothpaste. Let's just say I am still waiting
4. Bag shows up. Look through it and low and behold my white Chanel bag and new Luois Vuitton bag are missing along with my blavk coyote Ugly bikini. ( I about lost my mind, I was so pissed)
5. We were invited to a party at the new Pure management club. We got there and I was forced to put my credit card down. They tried to charge Over $1200 even though the party was already paid for. ( Very pissed off but trying to play it cool so Chantel doesn't know I'm upset)
6. Wore high heels to wedding went to bed with a completely swollen foot

It really was a beautiful wedding. Chantel looked gorgeous and I cried when she recited her vows to her new husband. It was a very emotional moment.
Unfortunately, I just could not seem to get passed my bags being stolen. The Atlantis is a resort that I would describe as Sea World meets a Waterpark meets Atlantic City. The resort is sub divided into areas, Beach Towers, Coral Towers, Royal Towers, and the Cove. Beach Towers being the cheapest and moving into ascending order finishing at the Cove which is the most expensive. Except For Chantel and her new husband , they stayed at The Cove, we all stayed at the Coral Towers. You could really see the change in service and luxury according to the area which you stayed. Unfortunately, I stayed at the second cheapest so I was given no help locating my bag and generally lack luster service in all areas. I went to Chantels room to put on her makeup for the wedding, and it was a totally different level of comfort and service, everything top notch. A great resort for kids. They have so many options plus the whole resort is surrounded by lagoon style aquariums where sharks, stingrays and other fish swim. So visually it is a childs greatest dream.
If you are looking for the peaceful, romantic, caribbean experience this is not the place for you. But if you are looking for a resort that offers a lot of activities like water slides, lazy river, shark feedings , and gambling then this is the place. Once your there it is pretty expensive so if you are on a tight budget you should make sure you bring everything you need.
That's it.
Memphis GREAT WEEKEND!!!

What a day. Jackson and I woke up this morning with his hand completely swollen. Yesterday he had gotten biten by one of these furry caterpillars that are so common in New Orleans. I really did not think much of it because he is constantly picking them up and occassionally gets bitten. So off we were in the morning to wait at the doctors office for a consultation. When we arrived it was exactly what I expected. An allergic reaction from the bite treated with benadryl. Very routine. When we got home I was rushing to pack my bags and I decided to steam my dresses in the spare bathroom. When I turned the knob of the shower , the whole dial came off because the inner plastic piece had split in half. The scene in my house was straight out of a movie " jackson run down and get me some tools?" 5 minutes later " I couldn't find any tools" Which in turn means I have to run downstairs myself to find the tools, which are in the same drawer they have always been in. " ok Jackson I am going to try to use this tool if it doesn't work pass me the next device." 3 screwdrivers and two wrenches later and we are still at the same point with the shower running continuously. Finally a small scissor was able to turn the shower to the off position. Twenty minutes it took for us to turn this shower off. Handy I am not. The backround noise " mom I bet you daddy or jacob could of fixed it in a second"
Ok so I finally get packed . I bring Jackson late for school and drop Cheeto off to get boarded. Now I am trying to race to the airport. I get to the airport about 45 minutes before the flight was taking off. " sorry because your final destination is considered international you can't get on." crap. So I had to pay $400 extra to take tomorrows flight. The positives that came from this: I got to watch Wednesday's episode of "Lost". I was able to get a pedicure. And I had dinner with Jeff M.
On a side note, jackson and I watched an epsidode of " Dirty Jobs" last night. Freaking hysterical. I know I should not laugh at the expense of others but when the host gets bitten by a snake multiple times I was drooling I was laughing so hard. and Jackson was gaffawing everytime the snakes peed and pooed on him. I decided to dvr that show because we thoroughly enjoyed it. By the way, I think there must be more viewers this year for my little show because I am definitely getting recognized more outside of one of the bars then I ever did before. weird.

Austin is kicking butt!!!! I am so pleased.
I took Jackson's friend with us out to dinner yesterday. The kids actually said they wanted sushi. Jackson's friend is an eater. He eats everything. I said to them "do you want to try some new stuff?" " Yeah great" Well I ordered them a roll with eel. They both ate one piece and pretended to hate it . I told them they hate to eat one more piece ( without eel top) if they wanted to go for ice cream afterwards. Well jackson's friend thought it would be funny if he made himself actually throw up right there at the sushi bar. I was so fucking pissed and embarrassed. I left the waiter $100 cause it was so gross. I told Jackson " thank god you were good. But know you better never pull a stunt like that." There were a group of two mothers next to us. You could tell they were laughing at us and sympathisizing with me all at the same time. As I handed over the tip I made sure to say " I am so sorry. He isn't my kid." Yesterday was just a crappy day. But today I feel a change coming. Off to Chantel's wedding.

I am so weepy pathetic tonight. I got a flat tire today. So I called the road side assistance from Progressive my insurance company. The operator told me she could not find my policy, even though I had the card right in my hand and read her the policy number. She told me that she would send the truck but I would have to pay. I said" I can show him my copy of insurance" Her response: "no it has to show up on the computer so you will have to pay" What fucking crap. So I told her no and I called AAA. they came right away which was great but like an idiot my spare tire was flat from last year's flat tire incident. So he filled it enough for me to get home and go to the Firestone shop. Well of course Firestone does not carry a tire that fits the Range Rover. I called 4 other places none of which carry a tire that fits the Range Rover. So it has to be specially ordered. Kevin told me to get rid of this car before it hits 50,000 miles. Shit i am at about 48,000. DON'T BUY RANGE ROVER!! As an added bonus a bunch of warning lights are on in my car. Great. Considering my car was just in the shop for 1 full month. What a piece of shit!!!
The good news. i ordered a pair a red high heels on line for chantels wedding. i am not supposed to wear heels but i figured if I sit down I can put them on and at least look good while seated. Low and behold they have a metarsial pad build into the foot pad!!! Thank you god for making one dream come true.
My son said so many funny things tonight. We were talking about what would happen if we made a ton of money ( $1000). He said " mom I don't need that much money I am only a human being who will eventually die. I would never need that much money"