It's hard to celebrate New Years after seeing what is going on in other parts of the world. I just donated to the American Red Cross Response Fund to help the victims of the tsunami. I hope other people do the same.

Happy New Year.

Aaron called today to tell me that a bouncer at a well-known Bourbon Street bar killed someone last night. Some serious stuff. Aaron threw an impromptu bouncers meeting to make sure the bouncers knew what happened at the other bar, but primarily to reinforce the theory that we never get physical with the customers. At all my bars we always tell the bouncers to talk to people. The Austin and San Antonio bars had a challenge of how long they could go without an altercation at the bars. I think Austin won.

The Nashville bar is already busy and it's only 2 pm. Tonight is usually a crazy night. Cross my fingers everyone is safe and sound at all my bars.

The website persons wanted me to do a "Coyote of the Year" but I don't want to do that. What I would like to do is have the various General Managers pick a girl from each location so she can be "Coyote of the Year" at that particular location.

Happy New Year!

Thank you Blaine in New Orleans for the very nice Christmas gift.

This person, a promoter from Egypt, keeps on calling my corporate office and the individual bars requesting girls to come to Egypt. He claims he wants them as an opening act for the celebration of the opening of Hard Rock there. I respect the Hard Rock people but I am not co-branding with them and I'm not using my girls to promote any other venues. Well this guy wants to bypass me by asking the licensees to send their girls. Guess what! I just spoke with my lawyers and I will make sure none of the Coyote girls (licensees or mine) go over there. I have no doubt, one of the licensees -- I won't name names -- is already booking the tickets. Well all I can say to that is; it will be a very, very, very, I mean VERY expensive trip. "Don't let up, Jeff!"

So one of the merch companies sent the wrong belt buckle to the Nashville bar. I just got a picture of it. It is a picture of Mary ( virgin) in the center of a pewter ornate setting. I know , yet again, I will get struck down by god for saying this but how ridiculously funny would it be to sell a belt buckle immortalizing Mary at the bars. Maybe create something where the front has a picture of Mary but somewhere on the back is a picture of Satan and then embroider Coyote Ugly directly on the leather belt.
He wouldn't admit to it, but I know Lee must of asked the company to create these buckles for him. He has pictures of Jesus and Mary all over his bathroom. This is right up his alley. But he swears he never requested that.
I hired a new assistant today. She is very organized, and very polite. Thank god. The paper work had just piled up while I was in Nashville.
It seems that CMT played our pilot in Canada. I received a ton of e-mails from people living there. Who knows hopefully one day we will be in Canada!

What a day. I had a meeting scheduled at noon. He showed up at 12:30. I get a call from Jacqui about a mistake we made addressing a check for a license renewal. Instead of them saying " no big deal just overnight it to us ." They made me jump through hoops. I ended my meeting I had to run back home. They wanted me to fax my social security card. Well I haven't used my social security card since I was a kid. It was essential that I prove who I am ( driver's license not good enough) to pay this thing. I tore my office apart and finally found it. Jacqui had offered to drive and replace the check. No! They couldn't accept that. Everything was already completely in order. But no, they just needed those few extra hoops just to make our lives miserable. Same thing happens every year in New Orleans. They put Aaron through the ringer just to tell him that I have to personally come in to wait on a 5 hour line to give them the same check he would of given them.
Got a very nice compliment about Jennifer in New Orleans. Good job.
OK Is it the apocolypse? It snowed on christmas in New Orleans. The last time it snowed on Christmas in New Orleans was 50 years ago. In fact the last time it snowed at all was 15 years ago. Now all these tsunamis. Very eerie ( sp).

The Coyote Ugly Pig Harley: Response for my question on how do I know if he will not be killed.

"The pig is going to “Tiny” He is one of our head of security ." Jenn Hawk

So is Tiny going to guarantee that Harley the Coyote Ugly pig lives out the rest of his years in peace?

It's hailing in New Orleans today. I guess that is as close to snow as we will ever see down here. I can't wait for Jackson to open his presents!! Of course I got him a trampoline for the back yard and it is hailing/ raining outside.
In a bar operators mind, IT REALLY SUCKS WHEN CHRISTMAS AND NEW YEARS FALL ON A WEEKEND! I just read the reports from all the bars and they were all painfully slow this week. At least the NY bar is consistent. The regulars come in on Christmas because it is home. It would be like not going over to your favorite aunt's house when she lives only a block away. I used to bartend every Christmas in New York and give all the bartenders off. It was always painfully slow until 10 pm then we would always get hit. Those were some very fun holidays.
Happy Holidays

ODE TO MARSHALL
(Cayce, Jennifer, Kelly - - 2004)

Here's to the man watching me drink too much Crown
He looks at me funny and gives me a frown
He scowls, "do more dances and get on the mike,
stop talking to regulars and flirting with dykes."

Here's to the man watching me drink too much Stoli,
I know I'm not dancing on the stripper pole-y.
He says, "This is a respectable bar,
so stop getting drunk or you can't take your car."

Here's to the man watching me drink too much Jose.
He says, "You'd better watch it or you won't make it through today.
Remember girls it's an eight hour shift,
stop defying my orders and giving me shit."

So, pull yourself together and stop getting drunk
And maybe you'll be Coyote Of The Month.
All we are thinking is drink some more Jack
And maybe someday you'll cut us some slack.

I love that the Austin girls love Marshall so much. By the way Cayce is December's Coyote of the month. Good job!!

Jenn Hawk's daughter found a farm that will keep the pig and not kill him. So it looks like I am sponsoring Harley the pig. She better send me pictures of the pig a year from now. I could not live with myself knowing the pig I sponsored became bacon or a large rack of ribs!!

OK. My new headshot is up on the web. I can't believe I'm going to say this but I think I like the non airbrushed version better. I gave Amelie, web person, the choice of which to put up. But the one she chose is so airbrushed it looks fake. Let me tell you about headshots. I am no actress. I never had headshots done until a few years ago. I hate getting them done. I feel so uncomfortable.

Well I got them back with some of the corporate shots that are hysterical. There were hundreds of pictures. Out of the 700 pictures, I only look good in 4 of them. If my face looked good, my body looked fat. Or my body looked good but my mouth looked weird. I actually saved one picture where one of my arms looks muscular but the rest of me looks like crap.

Jacqui and I posed for some. She looks awesome but I look bad. We actually had a lot of fun doing this. The corporate shot in front of the Coyote truck is awesome. I'll post them soon. One of my freaking bouncers from New Orleans wrote me to tell me that the picture reminds him of Elvira: Being unemployed during the holidays is rough!! Only kidding, Gerri.

What a day. Jackson had his Christmas show. He is not timid at all. Not one ounce of stage fright. A born actor.

I'm running around today trying to get 3 weeks of work done so I can actually go on a real vacation on Monday.

Aaron told me that one of the girls actually asked: "Do we open on New Year's Eve?"
I will end with that priceless gem.

I fucked up today. When I'm in town I open the New Orleans bar every Wednesday and Saturday. Well I haven't opened the bar in a few weeks because I was in Nashville. This morning I had a leisurely morning. I walked to Starbucks, I walked the track 2 miles, and I took a few business calls. I checked my e-mail at 11:30 am and there was an e-mail from Aaron about the bar. I had to jump in my car and haul ass down to the bar. I got there at 11:55 -- 5 minutes before we are scheduled to open. When I got there I apologized to Sara and Darryl for being late. They laughed because they knew I'd be late. They said they were about to have a bet on when I would come in.

For the record, I never open the bar late. I usually show up late (Late for a manager; I should get there at 10:30 am, so I get all the book work done. But I usually get there at 11:15). So I'm scrambling to get all my work done, so I can open the bar on time, which is at noon. New Orleans is the first bar I have ever owned where the girls show up early. So when I'm late (11:15) I have to send them to the coffee shop till I'm done. But let me reiterate: I always get the bar opened on time.

Kitty is taking extended maternity leave. She has a gorgeous baby. Unfortunately, I feel an incredible sense of anxiety over this. Never gets easier.

I had 648 messages on my lil spill e-mail account. I'm sorry but I just deleted all of them because I can't keep up. If it's important write again and I will respond.
Nashville is kicking some butt!!! 135 body shots yesterday. That's the new record!
I can't believe this year is almost over. What a crazy year.
I may have the NY 12 year anniversary in early January. Last week Maria, from NY bar, said "but Lil the anniversary is on the 12th." The actual anniversary is January 27th. I just happen to hold the anniversary party on a day that's good for me. So if I can't go on the 27th, I just change the day of the party. Today I'm working on Denver. That is coming up pretty fast.
I'm going to force myself to take a few days off.
I know I haven't picked a Coyote of month.

Jenn Hawk, head bartender for San Antonio, asked me if I could sponsor her daughter's pig. She even showed me pictures of this pig. She seemed so proud of this pig and her daugther. I would love to help her daughter. "They don't kill the pig, right?" Her look went blank. Well it looks like I'm not sponsoring the pig.

Nashville girls started to pick up the pace. Ashley, a Nashville girl, sold the most body shots on Friday. Well that screamed challenge to Esther (Austin). On Saturday night, she would knock a girl over before someone else got that sale. Very funny! Jamie, Nashville girl, lightning fast. I love that. Chastity, great on the mic.

So I asked Jeff M., GM Nashville, to book the hotels for all the traveling Coyotes and bouncers that I brought here. "Lil I got a place over the bridge. It's a great little hotel. Just $60 a night." Well this week 2 girls had to change rooms because of mice. Chantel came home to her room being flooded. Even the bouncers were scared. "Lil, it was $60."

We are kicking some butt in Nashville. I never give projections because they are just that, projections. In my educated opinion, I projected ( to myself) the Nashville bar's revenues somewhere in between Austin and San Antonio numbers. We are three days in and we are above opening numbers in San Antonio. That would be incredible if we keep this up. I think it will be dependent on the Nashville market, conventions etc.
Just a little to know fact. Nashville has the best science center for kids that I have seen in the country. Jackson had an awesome time there today.
Some funny stuff going on between the girls. This bar is 108 feet long. Walking down to the far end is killing me.
There is a bar down the street that has fights every night. It really pisses me off. Last night my bouncers had to help them outside. The residents had complained about this place, now I am iritated with them.
Till tommorrow

Lot of stress today but we're actually in good spirits. We had a photoshoot for the big team players, Jacqui, Jeff, Kevin, Lee and myself. We did Sapranoesque shots. Pretty funny. Jeff came down for the opening " Lil you seem nervous." " Of course I'm nervous we are opening our 14th bar tonight." I love Jeff. He's so funny.
I said to the photographer " can you do airbrushing?" no more then 3 hours of sleep a night for the last three nights, I'm feeling kind of schlumpy.

I have been working on the jukebox for 6 hours. What a pain in the ass. I received a very funny e-mail from Jeff Myers, gm Nashville

OK...Here is my x-mas wish if it's not to much to ask. I would LOVE to have
a double jointed brunette dark skinned supermodel that loves passion,
romance, and sex. She should be very independent, and have access to tickets
for all major sporting events. Bi-sexual would be a definite bonus. Thanks a
bunch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I haven't picked a December Coyote of the month. The web guy is hounding me. Give me a fucking break. I'll pick one when I'm ready. I want to pick a Dallas girl but I'm not sure if the girl I was thinking about is still there.
I'm swamped. The stress level at the Nashville bar today is very high. I did a morning show in Nashville this morning. I go in chanting to myself " please don't curse, please don't curse." So I limited myself to one " freaking". I can live with that. Usually I say something bad and Lee has to apologize to them for me. I can't help cursing, it's part of my genetic makeup.
I'm so proud of these girls, they have worked their butts off.
We have been doing tastings for the kitchen menu. We are on our second batch of Chicken Wings. Jeff is from Buffalo so the wings have to be perfect. " Jeff , I won't let you down!"

Last night we took the Nashville girls out for a night on the town. They are funny. They were relentless at trying to seduce Kyle. So funny. Grabbing his butt, touching his shaved head, trying to dance really ( really ) close to him. But Kyle didn't budge. Like a rock, that's why I love him.
Tim was hysterical last night. He got bombed. First few drinks: " Lil, are you going to fire me?" Then a few more drinks: " Lil please don't fire me" Then a few more drinks " OK Lil if you're going to fire me please do it after the holidays" A few more drinks: " Is sleeping with Cyndi fraternization?"
Kevin was pretty loaded but he said something that was so kind. " Lil I've been working with you almost 2 years. I remember 2 years ago getting the Dallas bar started. You, Lee, and myself were talking about our future plans for the company. I never would of believed that 2 years later we would be working on our 14th bar, riding in the Coyote truck, flying to the Middle East, and pursuing other international cities. Lil I love you and I will follow you where ever you lead us."

I've never heard this one. Jacqui got a doctor's note from one of the Nashville girls. ".... Can not attend dance rehearsal because she is harvesting her eggs." Unfuckingbelievable.

We passed all of our inspections today! Phew! Jacqui gave a great report about the girls. I'm so pleased. Jeff Myers, the new gm, called me to congratulate me for the positive inspections. How nice is that? He won big points with that. I sometimes mock people from the south, but they really have such nice manners.

I'm really proud of the new management team in Nashville. Usually it takes a little time for the managers to mesh but they seem to have an instant comraderie. Jeff M. GM, Kyle AM, Heath AM. Not one girl applied for the position (of course only after we had hired people). Things are moving along. We are taking the girls out this Saturday. Watch out Nashville! Now I've got the always impending problem, what to wear?

Yesterday we passed our Health inspection, today we have the Beer Board Inspection and the Fire Inspection. I'm crossing my fingers. People never understand how stressful it is to open a bar. Yesterday Kevin and I were in a meeting with the architect in Nashville. I was telling Kevin that I felt he wasn't as anxious as he is during most openings. Now the reason this is so weird is because we have two projects going at once, Nashville and Denver. Kevin has a lot on his plate right now. The contractor for the Denver project has called a few times and Kevin is definitely concerned. But we are a week away from the Nashville opening and he simply can't fly out to Denver. So I said to him yesterday, "Kevin, you are amazingly calm for this one." (You just have to know Kevin). Unfortunately, his response was not one that I liked to hear. "Well Lil, I've accepted in my mind that until I get to Denver, that project is going to crash and burn! So it really takes the pressure off." "Not funny Kevin." So Nashville opens Dec. 8th; Kevin will be at the job site in Denver Dec. 9th.