Past Lil Spills

Liliana Lovell, Coyote Ugly Saloon Founder

More Lil Spills

2017
2016
2015
2014
2013
2012
2011
2010
2009

June 29, 2013

Oh brother. I went on a dinner date with this nice guy. He’s a personal trainer. At dinner he told me that he makes extra money selling this ” life saving product.” (Oh no, its an Amway scheme.Different company but same scheme.) Well he talked about it and I acted charming and polite. He then asked me if I would come to his next meeting? ” No thank you.” Well that ended the date very quickly. He just texted me asking me out again . Also inquiring why I was so quick to say no to the meeting? My response ” I looked up your product and the main ingredient has positive reviews but I can get that ingredient at GNC without going through the sales scheme.” He then promised not to mention this at our next date. ” No thank you.”

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June 28, 2013

He finally did it! Lee pushed me to my breaking point. Last Friday I landed from OKC with a call from Lee ” did you look at the calendar images?” The next morning ” do you have your calendar picks ready? ” Finally on Sunday I said to Lee that I was feeling a bit burnt out and I would have it all done Friday the 27th by 5 pm. That was Sunday. He has not let up on me all week . He has not only called me at least once a day ( sometimes twice) the incessant texting about the calendar has been overwhelming. Today, I was at a class with Jackson. When I got to the car there was a voicemail from Lee and several text messages. The last one being ” your stunned silence is reassuring.” That’s it! It’s Friday, it’s not 5 pm. I have finished 5 girls and I had plenty of time to finish the rest. I went berserk ! What part of I am a bit burnt out give me till Friday didn’t he understand? Well now I am fucking done. I sent Chantel a text asking her to take over. Had Lee not badgered me till my breaking point he would have it all done by 5 pm central time. Now he will have to wait for Chantel to look at the 4000 images. ” sorry Chantel “.
I am taking off July 3rd-7th. I have decided that I will not answer any work calls or emails. I need a break.

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June 27, 2013


This is Tommy’s concession video to me from our anniversary party challenge. Lol. The bet was that I took three bars and he took three bars. The winner was the person who not only grossed the most cumulatively on their appointed bars’ anniversary party nights. But also which parties were most fun. I was the clear winner. ( he is bombed in this video)

Daniel why on earth are you face timing me?” ” Lil, Tommy and I are out on our new boat and thought it would be cool to FaceTime you while having a drink showing you how beautiful Lake Travis is.” ” Daniel , I only face time Jackson and that’s rarely.” ( For accuracy, I did allow a date to FaceTime me once. ” babe, you know what I look like. “His response was “make sure you don’t have any buggers in your nose and put on some makeup if you want cause we are face timing. ” I took it the other direction, I wore no makeup and had on my pjs. I guess it went well cause we dated a few times after that. )

It was funny that Tommy and Daniel had every intention to practice swimming but they haven’t bought an anchor for their boat yet and felt concerned that the boat might float away. Good for them!

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June 26, 2013

In today’s mail I received a letter from my son.
“I am already home by now so this letter is completely unnecessary. Jackson”
That was it. Not even a “Love Jackson” urgh
Funny email from Mac ( GM Memphis) to all the other GMs entitled. ” Checklist for gms so you don’t get yelled at.” The beauty is that I don’t do the yelling, it’s Daniel they fear. LOL

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June 26, 2013

Horrible flooding in Canada. The distillery that produces Coyote Ugly Whisky is partially submerged. image

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June 25, 2013

Went to boxing today. Urgh who knew that Jackson’s kids gloves weren’t good? image

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June 24, 2013

All is right with the world when my son is back home. When I saw him walk up to me at the airport I immediately recognized his pure joy. Joy for being back home and joy for being able to tell his dad and I all of his exploits on his adventure at camp. While I noticed that he was possibly the greasiest, dirtiest kid in the airport , I also noticed as I leaned in for a hug that there were objects in his hair only grown in petri dishes. yuck. ” Jackson those can’t be your shorts . They don’t even fit you.” ” I know mom, I dropped my bag in the lake the first day and borrowed these shorts.” ” Jackson you wore those shorts for 2 weeks straight.” ” Yes” I am triple washing all of his clothes. Everything is so disgusting . I can’t get the mildew smell out of anything. All worth the happiness he has in him and the happiness that is back in our house. I love my little boy.

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June 23, 2013

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Lauren from San Antonio right before her calendar shoot! Yup I have to wear glasses once in a while. It was odd that I would have to take my glasses off to look at the photos. When I would wear them all the colors seemed muted.

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June 23, 2013

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Chantel, Lee , and I were just joking around at this point during the photoshoot. I like to call this our “Dusk till Dawn ” shot. We had been working for 12 hours and it was 110 degrees in the heat. I think we were a bit delirious!
Ok did Zombie run this morning. It was fun. It was my friend’s first time ever running a 5 k. She did it! Jackson gets home tomorrow from Sleep Away Camp! I miss him so much

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June 23, 2013

What a funny evening. My friend was on a casual date. One of those, I’ll meet you for a drink dates. She calls me up and asks me to stop by to help break the ice. So I stop by. We sit at the bar. I am on the end, she is next to me and her date is at the end. This guy comes to the bar to order a drink and introduces himself to me. So we exchange names.
Boy: ” Do you want to come to my house?” Me: No we just met. Boy: ” OK well I already know we are going home together so I guess I am coming to your house.” Me: Sorry I am doing the Zombie run tomorrow and have to be up at 5 am. lol Poor guy tried everything. After he left he looked so dejected. Almost pitiful. We were trying to wager how old he was. I am thinking 24? Our highest guess was 26. I guess I’ve still got it. lol Now if I could just have “IT” for the right guys.
Doing the 5k Zombie run tomorrow. I signed my friend up as well. Let’s see if she shows up.

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June 21, 2013

OKC BMFs coming out in bikinis for the 4 year anniversary! Hot damn they were good. I told Katie that I think Blake should be the dance captain for that bar. They were better then the girls last night.

Such a fun night. Thanks to the incredible staff for doing such a good job on the party and red bull for taking is out to dinner!

I am sitting at the airport with a head ache that rivals the Memphis anniversary. These anniversaries are killing me.

Today I should be receiving a video from Tommy declaring me the official winner of our anniversary contest. I will post it when I received it.

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June 20, 2013

Redbull took us out for dinner in OKC. Kevin order the Kobe Steak, $240. Daniel and I were mortified ” Dude that steak is $240. I can’t believe you ordered that!” Surprise surprise . This is why Kevin gets yelled at every month for his expense report. image

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June 20, 2013

Heading to OKC for the 4 year anniversary!
So I was reading on the Perez Hilton blog about Kristen Stewart hanging out at the CU in Memphis. Mac our GM texted to tell me that Kristen Stewart came to the bar. What catches my eye in the Perez Hilton blog is that he claims that the bar was going to close early. WE NEVER close early!
Ok 2 days back in the gym. I feel so much better. What’s interesting is that this was the first week in possibly a year that I took off 2 days in a row from exercising due to the hectic calendar shoot schedule. Yesterday when I woke up I felt pain free for the first time in so long I can not remember. Maybe my body is telling me something.

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June 19, 2013

Went to the gym. Bam! Went and got coffee. Bam. Checked my emails and walked straight into a mirrored wall. Bang!!!! I can’t be cool all day. This man walking toward me and this woman walking behind me both lowered there heads after I smacked into the wall. I swear they were more embarrassed then me. I just started laughing. Its the moments of vulnerability that keep you humble.
I am waiting for Lee to show up and and show me some of the photographers images from the shoot. This was a great experience but it was a ton of work moving to so many locations especially in such heat. It was over a 100 degrees both days. I feel so dehydrated.
I feel a glass of wine is in order.
Tomorrow I will be at the OKC bar!!!

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June 19, 2013

My god the girls look gorgeous . ” Lil take a picture with us.” As a woman , I feel ( and Chantel concurs) that taking photos while you have no makeup on when the girls are in professional makeup and bikinis simply makes you feel ugly and fat! Lol

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June 19, 2013

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Lee, Chantel, and me ! This is our 8th year as the calendar production team ! We are bouncing off the walls. Such little sleep but this will ROCK!

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June 18, 2013

Bam first shoot of the day ! Christina has a slamming body. ( yeah makes me want to gag but I love her)
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June 17, 2013

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First day Coyote calendar shoot. 3 am and no coffee. I am cranky and crazy

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June 16, 2013

” Miss Lovell do you need another set of keys for your room?” ” Should I put another guest’s name on your reservation? ” ” perhaps tomorrow another guest will need a set of keys for your room? ” Finally my answer ” Sir, if I get lucky I will let you know. ”
Our first meeting with the photographer and his team in 1 hour! Fun

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June 16, 2013

Happy Father’s Day ! I called my dad . My mother answered and I had to convince her that Father’s Day was today and not next week. Jackson is always at sleep away camp during Father’s Day so I called to make sure his dad had a nice Father’s Day . Men are so much different then women. I expect a card and some well thought out gift or a special event planned. Jackson’s dad was very matter of fact ” I know the kid loves me and its too hot to do anything so I am fine about him not being here.” Ok but don’t ever think I am cool with just that.
I spoke with my 17 year old nephew today. His Russian girlfriend dumped him. ” Aunt Liliana, I am a very good looking guy so the girls will be lining up.” Hot damn don’t hate the player hate the game!
Heading to Vegas today for the 2014 calendar shoot.

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June 14, 2013

I tried to take yesterday off. As I was hiking up a beautiful mountain I received calls from almost every member of corporate. Jeremy , t shirt guy, even called me. ” Lil I promise I won’t call unless its an emergency.” A Tshirt emergency? Really? Lol
Please oh higher being let the calendar girls show up toned and fit. It’s a bikini calendar , there is only so much photoshopping we can do. Of course I get a call from Lee yesterday. ” Lil , Monday morning I will pick you up at 3 am to drive to the shoot location.” 3am? What the fuck! The photographer wants to shoot at 5 am. Please girls do not go out drinking on Sunday night! I will freak out if someone doesn’t show up or shows up looking like shit!
Rot Rally in Austin! I thought for one second I should go but I thought my health needed a little sunshine and less bar time.

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June 11, 2013

For Sale! I met a real estate agent yesterday to talk about selling my house next year. She brought over some sale sheets of houses similar to my house. ” Cynthia, how much do you think I will lose?” Low and behold, I may make money! At the end of our conversation she threw in one caveat: ” barring we don’t have a bad hurricane .” That’s it, I saw the dollar bills in my eyes. I need to act fast. I will do a few cosmetic changes and as of July 18th my house will be on the market . I am not waiting through hurricane season. Jackson and I can rent during the school year. Hot damn.
Today I send Jackson to sleep away camp. I am always a bit sad when he leaves. I hate that they don’t allow cell phones. He is not allowed to call us and we can not call him. urgh But he always has fun. My little boy is growing up.

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June 10, 2013

Thank you guys! I love my BMFs!image

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June 10, 2013

Fanfare done now Rot Rally is coming! We have a lot of traveling girls who headed to Nashville to work now they will travel to Austin to also work, some even meeting me in Vegas next week for the Calendar shoot. A long two weeks for the girls but I will make sure they have fun in Vegas.
I was just on the phone with Daniel. Of course the majority of our call was business but it always leads back to ” Lil I am scared of the triathlon.” Both of us were laughing. Shit, I have been swimming every other day and I have yet to swim 400 meters without taking a break. The tri in Destin is 800 meters in the ocean. Today I swam a total of 1000 meters. Saturday I swam 850 meters. But again, I take breaks or switch to different drills. Jackson and his friend Gabe swam with me on Saturday. Neither kid is a great technical swimmer but they never lose energy . We did 10 laps using only legs. I swear Jackson was like the energizer bunny . When he finished his 10th lap, I was only finishing my 6th. Gabe was great when only using his arms and no legs. I swam this morning at 6 am. By the time I got back home, I decided to take all my calls while in bed. URGH
I have a friend in New Orleans who is very similar to me in regards to goals and finances but we lead totally different lives. She always has friends over her house. Every night she is at a different event or at a party. She loves life. But she will call me and say ” force me to go running with you. Take me to crossfit.” She gets mad at herself for not working out more and eating better. I am the exact opposite . When I am not traveling, I wake up early. I am ultra dedicated to training , eating , and work. But I will call her and say ” you are so much happier then I am. I need to be more social.” Today I realized. ( talking to myself) ” Dumbass, you are goal driven. Make balance in your life a goal.” Ok that’s it! Fucking balance.

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June 8, 2013

Jeremy just sent me a picture of his daughters. So sweet and so gorgeous. Enjoy it now before they are teenagers. All day. : Jackson did you take the garbage out? Answer: I don’t know did I? – Jackson is your friend having fun? answer: I don’t know. Is he?
This has been going on all day. ” mom I know why you can’t cry in space but you don’t.” I just deleted what I wanted to write. OMG. How many years of this do I have? ” Jackson you took the two dogs out for a walk. Why is there only one inside?” answer I don’t know . Is there only one inside?” The inner latin temper is boiling right now.

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June 7, 2013

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Tommy . Where is the triathlon onesy?

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June 7, 2013

Recently a former Navy Seal came out as a transgendered person. No joke , this person looked good as a man and looks good as a woman. He hit the transgender lottery, so to speak.
This women tried to sell her kids on Facebook.”News reports that in addition to the $1,000 price tag laid on her infant daughter, Van Horn tried selling a package deal including her 2-year-old child for $4,000. Both children were taken into state custody.” So does this mean she put more value on the older kid? I guess that’s fitting. The older one is only 1 or 2 years away from being a viable revenue source. How old are kids in sweat mills? Or maybe the value is that the older one is potty trained? Sleeps through the night? Really trying to get a better idea of the price point per kid . ( of course I think that’s horrible .There are horrible people in this world. I wish more horrible people were stupid like this woman so they could be caught)
I woke up today with a mental warning ” watch out for Littlin”” Yes I actually had a boyfriend who would put that phrase as an alarm on his phone for my PMS. ” You didn’t cook the eggs the way I like them. You don’t love me. No I am not PMS.” God I hope I was never that bad. The first step to recovery is to know when its coming. lol Damn that transgendered person. I bet he doesn’t get PMS!

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June 6, 2013

I can barely move. In the last few days I have done biking, swimming, crossfit, and running. My butt, legs, shoulders, and all in between hurt. I ran 2.5 miles this morning but I seriously don’t think I can do anything else. I just ordered the Coyote Ugly Bad Mudder F**ker dri fit shirts for our team at the Tahoe Tough Mudder!
For as liberal as I am the Obamacare health plan is seriously flawed. This is all we have been working on this week. Poor Jeff is seriously stressed out. Supposed to hit Miami but I think I need to stay home

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June 5, 2013

All the calendar girls are picked! Let the fighting between Lee and I begin. I just booked my flight to Vegas and I already have 3 texts from Lee. This shoot, he is the head honcho! He can choose the locations, the types of shot. Even which girl for a specific shot. I just want to be the stylist. Let me look at the girl, figure out her outfit and makeup then it’s all on him. No more ” Lil how did the picture come out?” All Lee. The new more chill Lil is here.
4 years at sleep away camp and I finally threw away the suggestion sheet. My son literally wears the same outfit everyday only changing for swimming. He wont let them even wash his laundry. In fact most of it his clothes are clean when I inspect his bag on arrival. There is a moldy smell on everything but unused. I won’t fall for overpacking this year!
Oddly quiet today. Kevin is on a semi vacation and obviously after a few days in Hawaii, he was miserable not working and has been texting and even called. He is so out of sorts when he isn’t working he actually sent a text. ” hey send Ninja here.” That’s code for send Jackson. ” Dude you are with your girlfriend in Hawaii” ( she just moved there and works some days). Perhaps I found another pathetic soul.

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June 4, 2013

My son’s first day at his volunteer job. ” mom , my responsibilities are speaking French and making sure the 6 year olds don’t get paper cuts. ” As long as its easy . lol. He rocked on his standardized tests. Please god or alien higher being, can he make a lot of money one day and take care of me?
Some very shady stuff going on that Daniel caught. Hmmm, you have to be on your toes at all times. Chantel and I are finalizing the calendar girls tonight!

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June 4, 2013

My bedroom is inundated with flying termites. I told a friend this morning that its like living an episode of fear factor every night. I moved into the guest room last night. Who knew that the mattress in the quest room was so comfy?
Lee loves to show off his family, as he should . His wife Dre, is super gorgeous and incidentally kind and nice. They have been doing P90x and running intervals. He sent me a picture of her in a bikini. My first reaction was to gag because she is so perfect but then the lightbulb hit!” Lee, lets make Dre the Coyote Ugly fitness model and enter her in competitions. ” I have to do a little leg work but I think we can venture into this world. ( when I say we I mean her.lol)
On the other side of the equation I said to my Triathlon trainer ” all these tri shorts and cycling shorts make me look fat. ” his response ” I wanted to talk to you about that. I think you are eating too much.” Lol. I am not fat god damn it, just thunder thighed! Chantel and I do have the biggest boobs in the triathlon world. That’s a plus!

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June 3, 2013

Hot damn ! Just read the Sunday night logs. Most of the bars did really well. Mama needs a new pair of running shoes!
Ok calendar time. Already have 2 girls picked now I need 10 more! I am on it.
So Daniel and I were too late registering for the San Diego Internation triathlon. Today I signed up Daniel, Chantel, Tommy and I for the Sandestin Triathlon. So proud of Daniel and Tommy for getting involved. About an hour after I registered the 4 of us, I receive a text from Daniel ” lil this is a lot farther then you told me.” To be honest I didnt realize that it was longer but we are signed up so that’s it we are doing it. ( since I didn’t realize it was quite a bit farther, I totally miscalculated our suspected finish times.)
The last triathlon that Chantel and I finished was a 1/4 mile swim, 13 mile bike ride , and a 3.1 mile run. The Sandestin Tri is a 1/2 mile swim, a 20 mile bike ride, and a 4 mile run. OK I just have to get my fat ass back in the water and also practice transitioning from bike to run. We have a lot of time to train. ( of shit. August in florida. LOL hot as hell. )

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June 1, 2013

Last night the staff in OKC closed the bar down and sequestered themselves and the customers in the areas of the bar that they felt safest. The worry and the responsibility is so great. I spoke to Lizzie ( gm) today about the fear I have if something happens to anyone . There was a family walking around Bricktown with no place to go so the staff let them come in and ride out the tornados in the bar . I felt this deep responsibility for this child. It’s so scary. This is nuts. I am seriously thinking of postponing the anniversary party till we are a bit further out of tornado season. Not sure.
Last night I saw Daniel at the Coyote in New Orleans. He looks better then I have ever seen him. He is running every day and looks great. He is doing the San Diego International Triathlon with me at the end of the month. So Proud of him. The company is really on a health kick. I love finding out about employees making such positive changes in their lives. Running, biking, crossfit. Its inspiring.

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